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My dearest daughter,

You’re married! What a MILESTONE!

What can I say? You may be tempted to wink and whisper, “How ’bout sayin’ nothin’ Mama?” You’ve been an amazing daughter who’s listened to me for years. I’d totally get it if you want to sit this one out, but a heart as full as mine needs a place to pour its sentiment.

There are a million thoughts that go through a mother’s mind when she watches her daughter cross the threshold of marriage, but I think I may have narrowed my million down to three.

{All Photo credits go to Katie Wheat of Cattura Bella Photography.}

01

Never doubt how deeply you are loved.

I don’t think you or I could tally the times we’ve said to one another “I love you,” but in case your trans-continental move makes you forget—

I. Love. You.

I’m counting on the fact that you believe this because, in the months (and years) ahead, memories will surface. Most, I think, will be sweet, but when one of my “failed Mom moments” pops up or in the off chance you’re blind-sided by a regret of your own, remember: love trumps everything.

The bible says it this way… love covers a multitude of sins or as The Voice version says:

“…love makes up for many faults.” 1 Peter 4:8

The reality is, the way we think shapes our present. It colors how we interpret our past, and it directs our future. Pinky promise me that you won’t forget this truth. Let it sink in deep and allow it to guide how you think. It will affect your life… in a GOOD way.

02

Never stop believing in the heart of the man you married.

It was apparent to me (and all the other guests at your wedding) how deeply you and your husband love one another. The two of you under the trellis with eyes for no one else is a memory I will always treasure.

The freshness of your young love spurred my second thought. I’m passing it on knowing full well you don’t need to hear it today. This thought belongs in your jar that contains the advice you sought from your guests for after fifteen years of marriage.

Today, it sounds obvious. After all, you fell in love with your man because you respect and admire who he is. However, if in the years to come, your belief is strained, then believe in the God that can lead and guide your husband into being exactly who God wants him to be.

The good news? God’s plan for your spouse includes him becoming the best possible version of the husband He knows you need.

In case all this sounds too touchy-feely, there are three concrete things you can do to safeguard how you feel about your husband:

1) Tell him you love him every single day. This is especially important when one or one or both of you aren’t feeling it. The verbal output of loving words can sometimes cause the heart to follow. But if feelings of affection have taken a temporary hike, say the words regardless. Doing so will drive a stake in your marriage that declares you are committed to each other no matter what.

2) Pray with him every single day. This one can be harder because— LIFE! We get busy. We’re out the door. We’re exhausted. But even if it’s quick, do it! The mutual prayer will remind you both that you’re not your own and you’re not on your own. Regular recall of these two facts will positively impact the future of your marriage.

3) Pray for him every single day. This is a bit easier because you can pray for him while you drive to work, do dishes, or feed the dog. Keeping your man prayed over and prayed up invites divine intervention over his life, his work, his hobbies, his parenting, and yes, his marriage! Pray regularly for this boy you love so dearly so that in years to come you won’t have to fight to fall in love again because you will have never fallen out.

03

Embrace the changes ahead.

I admire so many things about you. Your joy, your spunk, your kind heart, your matter-of-factness, and your desire for justice. I could make a long list of all the things I like about you.

What’s crazy is that it’s possible many aspects of who you are may change. I catch myself and wonder if that should make me sad, but honestly, it only makes me excited!

I believe that you and your husband are a new person. It’s a mystery to be sure, but two have become one. You are now someone whose two halves when surrendered to Christ will be carved more and more into His image. And where there is Jesus, there is abiding joy and deep peace. (Not to mention the added benefit of taking on one another’s strengths and fortifying one another’s weaknesses!)

I already love this new person SO much. I can’t wait to watch them grow!

That’s all I’ve got Sis. Just remember—

I love you.

I believe in your heart, believe in his.

I can’t wait to see who the two of you will become… together.

Savoring the journey with you,

Cindy (aka Mom)

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